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My Humanity Tested My Relationships

I never thought in a million years that speaking and standing up for human rights would test the relationships I've built over the years.

I walked in the women's rights march in 2017 and was part of the group that shut down I-95 in downtown Miami because I believe in public disobedience to pressure governments and "leaders" to do the right thing for us, the people.

I march with the BLM protests because Black Lives Matter and have been subjected to oppression and violence for hundreds of years.

And now I march for Palestine liberation because no human should endure what they have suffered for over 80 years of Israhell brutal occupation. Humanity's very existence is dependent on their liberation!! 

Deep in my bones and soul, I wholeheartedly believe EVERY human has the right to exist and defend their right to freedom. 

I do it because, as a white Latina, I've enjoyed privileges. I've had access to groups reserved for white women. 

I feel shame in admitting it, which is part of decolonization. We must owe up to our mistakes and take full responsibility.

Since October 2023, I have seen the communities I thought I had disappeared. Gone. The connections I've built over three decades of coaching and leadership distanced themselves because I spoke out for humanity.

Odd right? Extremely dysfunctional and dystopian‼️ Who would've thought?

I've seen someone I consider once a trusted friend like a post I shared in real-time, then realize it was about Palestine and "unliked" it. 

I admit it was sad because this person allegedly advocates for humanity, peace, and love.

I get it, though; I've been dismantling Western mainstream spirituality for years now, and in the last eight months, it finally dawned on me the reason they have remained silent or neutral during a genocide: because spirituality in the West is a colonial tool to keep us numb so we can be manipulated and easy to govern. 

It is disconnecting us from our humanity, reaping us from our collective empathy, and instilling fear.

I was uninvited by Latina women from collaborations and partnerships because I would not shut up about liberation for all humans and refuse to mold myself to fit into their oppressive narrative to be accepted at a table that discriminates and belittles women.

That is NOT women empowerment!

 I will never stand behind a movement that refuses to see women in their wholeness.

I was criticized and shamed by a great number of spiritual "feminists' who would hide behind their colonial spirituality and felt offended when I called out how mainstream spirituality has numbed and indoctrinated us into complicity by staying silent. 

I was censored during a women's "mastermind" and advised not to share "political" content. as if the massacre of women and children and men is political!

I had a pastor who I know personally, shame me with suicide, not knowing my family's history A pastor!

And a former employee from my past corporate life who is a religious fanatic justifies the killing of children. 

It was shocking, heartbreaking, and confusing to see women I trusted being complicit in upholding deceitful ideas that perpetuate and uphold white supremacy. I knew I did not want to be part of these circles again!

To Be censored by women because I stood for humanity was a shock at first, but it exposes the hypocrisy of the coaching, wellness, and spiritual communities. 

It was the false encouragement to speak your truth until you included the liberation of the women of the global south. Then you weren't allowed to speak at all.

At first, I was in disbelief. 

Then, I was disillusioned.  

Then, I felt rage at the indifference of my colleagues, a community I had trusted. 

God knows how often I've my heartbreak every single day. Every day after witnissing horrible footage coming from G@z@. I chose to bear witness because we all have become historians, which is also part of resisting oppression.

And then, I was surprised to receive messages from women who thanked me for speaking out. 

I realized at last why I never felt comfortable in these spaces; they were meant to confine our soul so we would forget how to connect with our spirit, our inner knowing, the purest essence of our being.

That's why I've always felt out of place: my spirit screamed to be free; that was my central calling to continue their liberation journey, dismantling colonial patriarchy.

It became clear. 

Now I see myself. 

I know myself.

I know where I stand.

I know I don't have the emotional or mental capacity to welcome people in my life who support the indiscriminate slaughter of children and are not fearlessly advocating for their liberation.

Palestine became my red line. Humanity became my red line. 

Recently, someone requested me to connect on social media, and after asking her what sparked her interest in connecting, I mentioned that my values are deeply rooted in humanitarian causes, including support for the Palestinian right to self-determination and liberation. If she shares these values, I would be glad to connect further! 

She never answered. 🤷🏻‍♀️

This body, home, family, and coaching practice are sacred. And only people who believe ALL humans deserve to live are welcome. 

End of story. Simple and Straightforward.

Moral clarity gives you the unwavering confidence of knowing you are standing in truth. And yes, it gives you the toughness to speak with conviction because you know you are doing the right thing. 

I know I am on the right side of history. 

The waves 🌊 of the people are crushing on the system that oppressed us, and it is becoming an unstoppable tsunami.

People will question where you stand on Palestine. They will hold people accountable for their silence and neutrality.

People will divest from services and products that do not publicly advocate and support Palestine, Sudan, and Congo's liberation. 

The world is changing, and the tide is turning.

Solidarity wasn't supposed to be comfortable or conditional.

As for me, I allowed myself to feel it all, then I take a deep breath and continued to fight, to share and amplify oppressed voices because being spiritual is being deeply connected to your spirit and all beings. Decolonizing your mind is fearlessly confronting the shadows of colonial supremacy and dismantling them every day.

Free Palestine!  Free Congo! Free Sudan!

With All My Love and Respect

Dayanna Valenciano

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